10,000 BC

I remember when this movie first came out. I was intrigued that the previews didn't really give anything away, but I guess the other side of that is that I didn't really know anything about it. Anyway, this movie hit theaters with horrible reviews and an even worse opening weekend, because of that, I didn't watch it.

I have this theory that every bad movie can be made better with a bad review. Likewise, a good movie can be ruined by a good review. It's like in order to get someone to enjoy something you have to kind of hate on it a little bit. Otherwise they expect to much.

With that in mind, I really enjoyed this movie despite (though maybe I should say "because of") all the bad reviews it got back in the day. It has action, adventure, and excitement. It's not an historical movie in any way, more of an action-adventure type of film.

10,000 BC is a movie that follows the character D'leh as he fights to get his friend, Evolet back from the Egyptian slavers that stole her. He must traverse the dangers of nature other societies as he traverses from the mountains through the forest and across the desert. In order to save his bff and possibly lover someday.

As for historical accuracy, it's hard to say I think just how much of this would be true for he people living at the time. In a way, it feels more like a fantasy in a mythical world than it does being in 10,000 BC on Earth.

Overall: B. Nothing really new here, but it was fun and exciting to watch. I liked the adventure aspect of it. It does get a little harder to follow towards the end a little bit when they get to ancient Egypt, but it was still fun.

10 Years

10 Years is an interesting movie. It revolves around a 10 year high school reunion. It stars Channing Tatum, Jenna Dewan-Tatum, and Justin Long. It also stars a shit-load of other people you've probably haven't heard of.

It's about a high school reunion and it follows around a variety of people. They all have their own problems throughout the movie that they deal with in different ways, but it gets a little confusing jumping around to all these different people. This movie suffers from the problem of "who the hell is the main character anyway?" meaning that the main character isn't any one person. Instead, this movie uses the setting of a high school reunion to tell multiple stories with multiple endings.

Part of me wanted this movie to be done in a way that focused first on one group, then on the next in short-film fashion rather than this jumping from group to group in a completely confusing way. It was hard to follow in the format it was in. I mean, eventually I got used to it, but until that point it would just jump around meeting different people in different groups so fast that I'm surprised I didn't start puking from motion sickness.

If you look to my right you'll see a picture of ALL THE MAIN CHARACTERS IN THE MOVIE! I'm not even kidding. Does it get a little confusing? Yes, yes it does.

Anyway, this movie wasn't bad. There was some pretty funny stuff throughout it and some dramatic moments too, but I feel this movie really wanted to be a comedy about a high school reunion more so than anything else, but does it succeed?

The answer is: sort of. It has it's moments. I laughed. It happened. But it doesn't really fit the formula of a movie. It doesn't have much of a plot, instead just showing us these random scenes with these people. I

mean, we DO get a sense of who these people were when they were in high school just as we get a sense of who these people are 10 years later. But, what we don't get is a good story arc, or much of a conclusion outside of "oh, i guess the reunion is over." "Let's go to the bar!" And they do, and we watch that for a bit, but it doesn't give us anything more. Just more scenes with these random people doing random things randomly.

Overall: C-. It had it's moments. Made me laugh. It had people who I ended up caring for and was interested to see what most of the people in this movie were going to do next. But the problem with having so many main characters really bog this down. There were a few characters I didn't know who they were no matter how many times we came back to them. Also, not having a plot might work for a poem or a short story, but you really need that in movies, otherwise you'll end up feeling like you just wasted two hours of your life. Now, I enjoyed this movie, but it really just seemed kind of meaningless. Movies need plots, they need conclusions THEY NEED STUFF TO HAPPEN IN THEM GOD DAMMIT! Otherwise, they really aren't worth the effort.

10 Things I Hate About You

10 Things I Hate About You is a teen movie from the 90s loosely based on William Shakespeare's "Taming of the Shrew." It stars Heath Ledger before he was dead, Joseph Gordon Levitts before he was famous, and Juilia Stiles before she was suddenly transformed into a flesh eating alien! Okay, that last part might not be true.

10 Things I Hate About You is a movie like no other. Oh wait, actually it's a movie that's like a lot of movies made at this time. For example, every single teen movie ever made. I mean it, it has all the same tropes or whatever you want to call them, that make teen movies what they are. Yup, despite being based on one of the Bard's plays it really doesn't do a single thing original or unique to the genre.

This movie is about Heath Ledger's character, Patrick, who is hired by Joseph Gordon-Levitt's character, Cameron James (funniest name in the movie), to seduce Julia Stiles' character, Kat. The reason for this is because Cameron wants to date Kat's younger sister whose overbearing father told them that she couldn't date unless Kat did. That part I kinda liked, based on The Bard's play and a clever twist on the same old shit. However, everything else after that kinda just makes me want to break stuff!

The reason for my urge to smash is that everything about this movie is completely cliche. It doesn't try to do even one thing original. True, it is pretty funny, at least it has its moments, but that doesn't make up for how little this movie does anything even remotely original. Heath is a bad boy, Julia is a prudish girl, they meet, they hate each other, then they love each other. Heath isn't as bad as he was anymore. Julia isn't as much of a prude. They're in love and that's all that matters right?

Oh yeah, and Joseph gets his girl too... SPOILER!

OVERALL: D+. I'm only giving it the plus because it was pretty funny. It was lacking in just about every other regards though. There wasn't anything in this movie that you couldn't get from, say, watching "Another Teen Movie," and that's the god damned parody for Christ's sake.

Updates to "How this works"

I kinda figured out that the whole "one a day" thing is a little bogus because I've found that I don't watch nearly enough movies for that. I still want to put on a review every time I watch a movie but I still can't promise anything about how often I can do it.

Paul

When Simon Pegg and Nick Frost (of Sean of the Dead and Hot Fuzz fame) work together they always seem to impress me. For those of you who don't know, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are two screen writers and actors who make movies specific to people who love movies, and, even better, these people really know comedy when they see it. This film has humor that is completely original and movies that are supposed to be "funny" have really been lacking lately. This movie is something to be desired and actively sought after by the mainstream American Cinema. It is never boring and, except for a slow part at the beginning, it is hilarious almost the entire time.

Plot: Two friends and fellow nerds from England, Graeme and Clive (Simon Pegg and Nick Frost) come to America to attend a Comicon in LA. Afterward they decide that since they're already in America they aught to rent an RV and go across the country to visit alien sighting hot spots that they've both followed since childhood. But as they travel looking for aliens they actually find one. Paul is foul mouthed, rude, smokes and has been here since the Roswell incident.Paul explains that he needs their help because he's escaped from the secret base at Area 51 and the government's now trying to kill him. Now Graeme and Clive need to take Paul to a place where he can be safe from the American agents sent to stop him.

What I Liked/Disliked: There was very, very little I disliked about this movie, so I'll start with that. There were only two things that I could think of and really they're both kind of trivial. One was that at one point Paul brings a bird back from the dead (you've probably seen this scene in the trailers) after he does one of the guys asks him if he could bring a human back from the dead and Paul replies that if he did it would be very dangerous for the both of them. As if to say, "when one of us dies later on in the movie would you be able to bring us back?" "Yeah, but it would probably almost kill us both if and when I do." I hate it when movies assume that the audience themselves couldn't figure something like this out. I know you wouldn't know that healing a human is different from healing a bird but I feel they could have set this up in a much more interesting way.

The other thing was the music, and not the music they chose to be in this movie and on the soundtrack, but I'm talking about the original music that they hired a composer to write and an orchestra to perform. It was like listening to any music from any emotional scene from any movie. What it lacked was originality in an otherwise completely original movie.

What I liked was everything else. The acting was superb, and Seth Rogan was perfect as the voice of Paul. Jason Bateman, Bill Hader, and Joe Lo Truglio all did a great job at playing the somewhat befuddling government agents after them. Kristen Wiig also did a good job in this playing a fundamentalist christian who first comes into the movie wearing a t-shirt with Jesus shooting Darwin in the face and spouting how the world is only 4000 years old and God created everyone in His image, only to be "shown" how evolution works by Paul and turning her world completely around. And, of course, Nick Frost and Simon Pegg were perfect for the roles they played.

Another thing that I think should be noted about this movie is how much homage it gives to movies like it in the same genre. The references are nearly non-stop. Think of any movie with an alien in it, Star Wars, Close Encounters, or even Mac and Me, somehow they've managed to put an allusion to it in the film. This is much like Pegg and Frost's previous films wherein they were able to perfectly reference a movie that they are obviously inspired by without totally ripping them off (like many other films tend to do).

Overall: A. The thing I appreciate more than anything else when it comes to cinema is originality. Paul manages to be a nearly perfect film and if not for the 2 problems I had with it it would have been. But despite the minor flaws this is still a film that I would highly recommend to anyone who enjoys movies either new or old.

Hall Pass

This is a Farrelly Brothers movie and really I suppose I expected more from Hall Pass. I don't know why I expected more since every film they've ever done has followed the same formula that puts people in really odd situations with idiotic conclusions, and their brand of humor has always followed the same rule that if the people in their picture don't act like real people then it has to be funny. I suppose, to be fair, this does work for them...fifteen years ago, but really every flick they've done since Me, Myself, and Irene has given us the same thing over and over again and I get it, really I do. You Farrellys are worried, nay, downright scared that if you were to make a movie that doesn't capitalize on your previous glory you would no longer be popular among your fans, though really I think you should ask anyone who's seen Shallow Hal how popular you are now.

The Plot: Maggie is worried that her husband Rick (Owen Wilson) is losing interest in her sexually when she keeps catching him checking out other women. After talking it over with two of her closest friends one of them suggest to her to give him a "hall pass" or a whole week off from marriage in order to strengthen their relationship. Maggie talks it over with Rick and they decide that she'll take their kids to her mom's house and he can do whatever he wants without any guilt for a whole week. Excited, Rick tells his best friend Fred (Jason Sudeikis) who immediately tells his wife that if she were to give him a week off as well then their relationship would also strengthen. At first Fred's wife is reluctant but eventually agrees (after he's caught jacking off in his minivan by the police). So now it's off to the races as Rick and Fred try their hardest to get layed and other misadventures from having a whole week off from their wives.

What I Liked/Disliked: Let's start with the (false) advertising. What the previews showed you was a couple of guys obsessed with sex who get a week off from their wives in order to cheat on them. It showed you some funny scenes: a guy taking mental photographs of a hot chick, an older "sex guru" type teaching the guys the right ways to objectify women, or even a scene where Fred and Rick are making fun of a man and his wife (and her large vagina) in their house as the subject of their jokes are watching them over the video security system. It looked like a lot of laughs, a lot of sex jokes, and totally a guy movie. What you got though was an entire half of a movie that wasn't advertised which was completely focused on Fred and Rick's wives. This movie is not a guy film, it's a date movie and the only thing keeping it from being a chick flick is all the guy related sex jokes which, unfortunately, are all completely ruined by every good joke being in the previews.

Another thing that really grinds my gears about this movie is its predictability. I guessed correctly at every twist or major plot point that happened throughout the whole flick. It never once tested me or showed me something that I hadn't seen a hundred times before. Then there was the humor. Though there were a couple of scenes that were hilarious and weren't ruined by the trailers, I mostly felt that any funny scene would've been more appropriate in a teen comedy than an adult date movie.

Overall: D-, This movie was sub-par. The acting was nothing special, Owen Wilson played Owen Wilson, Jason Sudeikis played the guy he played in The Hangover, all the women played the stereotypical woman from any movie. The plot was ridiculous and the only reason I could see for its ridiculousness was at least one of the Farrellys wanted to cheat on his wife and was trying to convince her it was a good idea "to make their marriage stronger." Either that or they've just run out of good ideas and are willing to print any bad one that comes into their heads (Shallow Hal). The only saving grace of this movie, and the only thing that kept it out of an F grade for me, was the soundtrack. And since I really have nothing else good to say about this movie I'm going to recommend that  you just buy the music for Hall Pass on Amazon and watch the preview over and over again as you listen to it and I bet you'd have a much better time than I did watching this piece of trash.

How This Works

Hello, and welcome to my movie blog where I'm going to review movies (duh). How I'm going to do this is simple, I will write a review for any movie I see after I see it. Whether it's something new that I just saw in theaters or a movie I rented that I'm watching for the thirtieth time. Whatever it is I watch I plan to review it as honestly and as timely as I can.

Hopefully I'll be able to do at least one a day but I can't promise anything.